Misheard Church Lyrics

We've all done this at one time or another, though not always with such meaningful results. Please, band members, take note ! Are you still sure it's desirable not to print lyric sheets in your albums ? It may help to "counterpoint the surrealism of the underlying metaphor" but the tradeoff is that various inattentive listeners will continue to produce gems like the following.
Harry Flowers provides the following misreading of an album cover

It's not a misheard lyric but I feel compelled to share it with someone anyway, out of sheer, I dunno,...nostalgia? Anyway, a friend of mine from another time and place had the original vinyl pressing of Remote Luxury. His brother (who can't have listened to the record) once asked me to play the song "Into my Honda", as he'd always been curious about the title. I checked the cover. If you squint the a does look like an o, and the s does look a bit like an a... and that's what I have seen everytime I've looked at it since.

Jenka has founded a soccer reference in Under The Milky Way !
Maradona you would find, instead of "might have known what you would find".
Jason sent me this one, which I've decided to print and say "the hell with good taste".
I also always thought that " riding high upon your golden cart" in Tyrant was actually "riding high upon your golden c*nt"

In Why Don't You Love Me (on the Comedown single), my brother and a mutual friend of ours both heard....
Carry a denture under your vest instead of
Carry a Derringer under your vest
Nancy B LaMotta says

I thought, in "Ritz," Steve was singing, "Still in search of Betty's scones" (I love to bake) [instead of "still in search of petty scores"]. and in "Comedown," since Steve mentions Justine, I always assumed the line was "It's like the Marquis (deSade) says one night on the stage," although why deSade would have been on a stage, I don't know, unless he used to give live sadomasochism performances to the public.

Thomas Irvin seems to be trying to corner the market on this page :) One of his co-workers came up with this sorcher, from Marty's Scandinavian Stare

Heard: Standing naked and scared

Actual: Scandinavian Stare

Thomas Irvin misheard the ending of One Day (which is actually the start of Bel-Air

Heard: Quite delighted with me last night, she said, hey, it's okay.
Actual: Palmtree nodded at me last night, he said, hey you look so pale

Nicole Hall listened to Myrrh

Heard:Never got to neutralize time
Actual: Never got to meet you last time

Christopher Koontz misheard Business Woman

Heard: "Beautiful power in her ass"
Actual: "Beautiful power in her eyes"

???? listened to Almost With You

Heard: "This lab research for a friend"
Actual: "This life reserved for a friend"

Thank you for starting this whole topic up ! Maybe Arista will start putting lyric sheets in their albums now.

Christopher Koontz misheard Disenchanted

Heard: "You get drunk, make a house that can jump and experience it as the past"
Actual: "....make a half second jump..."

It only took him three years to figure it out !

Adam couldn't get past Steve's accent while listening to Dead Man's Dream

Heard: "Gorgeous machines desalinate like thunder"
Actual: "....the sound they made like thunder"

My thoughts on this are that if you've got a 'gorgeous machine', it has to *do* something doesn't it ?

Cathy must have felt dreadful when Steve personally insulted her during Into My Hands

Heard: "Like Cathy, awful and absurd"
Actual: "Like happy, awful and absurd"

Thad Engeling was confused by the directness of this line from Myrhh

Heard: "We crap beneath the drunken moon"
Actual: "New Christ beneath the drumkit moon"

He then confirmed his subconcious obsession with all things "bathroomy" with his mishearing of the lyrics of Night Of Light

Heard: "Dishwater cafe on a toilet paper street"
Actual: "...a torn paper street"

Jeffrey R Ylvisaker misheard the opening line of Feel

Heard: "Fall Autumn"
Actual: "For all time"

Denise de la Vaux admits she'd get food out of any lyric, here's Exhibit A.

Heard: "She asks the spirits for an egg roll man"
Actual: "She asks the spirits for a romance"

James Dignan continues the toilet thread by misinterpreting the chorus "The Disillusionist"

Heard: "In winter he craps, in summer he warps."
Actual: "In winter he cracks, in summer he warps."

Thomas Irv (Irving ?) thought he found proof that Steve hated "overblown Irish rock bands"

Heard: "Back in Metropolis, the weather is ridiculous, was it only U2?"
Actual: "....what's it all leading to."

Thomas says he doesn't believe it, but what can you say about a man who heard the French part of The Beatles' Michelle as
"Someday monkey won't play piano on sun, play piano on sun"
Keith Smith (my brother...how embarassing ) obviously hadn't read the track list.

Heard: Russian Bottom Park
Actual: Russian Autumn Heart

Brian Turner didn't quite catch the opening line in Month of Sundays

Heard: Batman's woman with that look in her eye
Actual:Badman's woman with that look in her eye

Todd Oberly misheard Woman With A Reason while transcribing it for us

Heard: Probably end up in an old man's comb without that hair ???

(His question marks)

Actual: ...old man's home without that woman

At least, that's what I hear...you can never be truly sure though.
Paul Webb just resent me the lyrics to Quick Smoke. I wonder who it was that actually transcribed Texas Moon...

Heard: She said "I pray you can't accept that phallus see"

Actual: She said "I'm 'fraid I can't accept that fallacy"

As above, that's what I hear. The first line is *probably* wrong :)
Helen O'Sullivan got a good one out of An Interlude

Heard: Spacious frogs bejewelled and tied

Actual: Spacious floors bejewelled and tiled

Any aspiring graphic artist want to draw a picture of this ?!
Steve Kilbey pointed this one out to me himself. Our lyrics page had an error in the lyrics for Authority

Heard: Larry's our attorney, the others are stunned

Actual: Letters are returned, lovers are spurned

People, he is watching us, so we'd better be more careful !
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