These quotes were submitted by fans; they heard him say these things at concerts, etc. Unfortunately, I cannot vouch for their validity and will remove them if Steve sends his brothers to pummel me. Can you count how many times Steve says "fuck" in the quotes below?

(Before the show: Starfish Tour (Seattle)) Me: "Steve - Welcome to Seattle, how was the ride down?" (from Vancouver BC) "I met you up there last night."
Steve: "Ah ... Good. So, 'Is This Where You Live'"

(After the show Heyday Tour (Seattle))
Me: "Hey Steve - How did you guys come up with the name The Church?"
Steve: "That's the most poignant fucking question I've ever heard."
Me: "Thanks Steve."
Submitted by Ted Schueler.

(Intro to a song, GAF tour Australia (North, South, East, West?) )"This song is about the random and distant universe... oh, and picking up chicks on a Saturday night."

(To Grant McClennen Jack Frost Fremantle Australia, Snowjob Tour) "Thats a very obstreperous capo you've got there Grant", shortly afterwards amended to "ostentatious."
Submitted by Jeff Gray.

Steve: "What do you get when you cross Andrew Eldritch and the singer from Bauhaus? ... The Sisters of Murphy"

(This is a joke Steve told at a gig at the Northrop Auditorium in Minneapolis on the "Gold Afternoon Fix" tour in June 1990 just before playing the patty smith song "Dancing Barefoot") -- submitted by Scott Hiller.

"One of the greatest tragedies in recent American history is that our second and third albums never got released here." Submitted by Tim Prochnow.

Steve Kilbey walks out the door I am standing by before the show.  I say "Mr. Kilbey."   He says, "  I used to be but am not anymore."   He then shakes my hand and asks me directions to the laundromat and local pub called the Holy Grail.  Submitted by Heather Riddell.

Me to Steve about a past producer of the Church: "What did he call himself? Expensive whino?"
SK:  "Expensive coke fiend is more like it." (laughs) Submitted by Ali Awan.

My husband (to Steve; coming out the stage door after sound check): We're looking forward to the show tonight!
Steve: (pause to take cigarette out of his mouth and give a wry twist to the lips) Good.
(Submitted by Varmint, who says "Pretty lame, but we thought it was amusing at the time.")

"I can't sing with this thing on here. I feel like fucking Steven Tyler!" [After Marty had tied a scarf thrown from a fan to Steve's microphone stand.] Submitted by Paige (sorry I forgot to credit you!)

Sixteen year old boy:  "I am the only kid in my neighborhood who has a copy of 'Of Skins and Hearts.'   
Steve Kilbey:  "You should rent it out, then."    Heard by Beatrice.                                                            

"What's up with the fucking Christmas lights?" Submitted by Erich Peace.

"Y'know, when a band performs live, normally there's a light show to give the illusion that something's happening on-stage.  Tonight, I feel like a lobster on a fucking sideboard." [After playing under only harsh white lights] Submitted by Joe Caparo.

"Oh, do you like it?" [To drunken fan at gig in Canberra who shouted "YEAH!! YEAH!! FUCKIN' YEAH!! YOU ROCK!! YEAH!!"] Submitted by Jonathan Arnot-Smith.

Saw two acoustic gigs, just him and Marty Willson-Piper in
Brisbane a few years ago. During the first gig MWP
said nothing, played with a sour face all night and
was evidently unhappy about something, probably the
sound. At the start of the second gig:
   MWP: "Hello."
   SK: "Feeling better tonight, are we?" Submitted by Jonathan Arnot-Smith.

Gig in London last year:
   Fan: "Marty, that sounds great!"
   SK: "He can make one note sing . . "
   MWP: "Thanks"
   SK: " . . . which is good 'cos he only knows one
note." Submitted by Jonathan Arnot-Smith.

I talked to Steve after the Memphis gig, and he was dryly funny.

Me:  I loved "Pharmakoi", especially "Get over it"..
SK:  Really?  (looks surprised)
Me:  The relationship thing, you know, and "Two Places at Once", same thing.
SK:  (Laughs dryly)

I had the feeling he had been through the emotional relationship wringer. (Submitted by Jerry Jascomb.

"Rock..... It is my intention to rock... let's rock." [Intro to "Kings" at a concert] Submitted by Nancy LaMotta.

"Do you live near here?" - SK
"Yes" - me
"Could we (the Church) eat dinner at your house? It's been so long since we've had a home cooked meal."- SK
"Yes" - me
"Good. Let's go." - SK
"No way!" - Tour Manager
"It won't be long. I live quite close." - me
"How far?" - SK
"3 miles" - me
"No way!" - Tour Manager
"What are you serving for dinner anyway?" - SK
"Pasta." - me
"NO WAY!" - Tour Manager
"Sorry, I guess we'll have to eat the trash they'll give us here." - SK
1990 Grand Rapids, MI. USA  Gold Afternoon Fix tour
Submitted by Adam

While playing the bass line, "Inna-gada-da-vida baby, Inna-gada-da-vida honey," (pause) "what a fucking joke," second encore Gold Afternoon Fix tour, Houston, TX gig. Submitted by Joe Nozemack.

"It's like a sauna up here." [Memphis, Tennessee gig] Submitted by Jennifer Lesh.

""The bitter comes out better on a stolen guitar" [autograph on a beat up plastic Macafari guitar that was the only instrument left behind when the band's gear was stolen from their managers office during a break on the Starfish tour]. Submitted by Joe Nozemack

"Well, do you still wear the same clothes that you wore 17 years ago?" [When asked why the Church seldom plays older songs in concert] Submitted by Matt H.

"I made some coffee, it was too weak/I have a table made of teak/My parrot has a large beak." Approximate quote submitted by Cath.

"You're a lovely audience. Really lovely." He then points to Marty and says, "You guys are lovely, but he's beautiful." Submitted by Micah.

"Yeah, I'm going to blow up three times!" [When asked asked if he had any suprises for us tonight] Submitted by Rich.

..."This is one that should remind you of the first time DAH-DEE handed the keys to the beach house over to your lame little arses."  [Introducing a song at a snobby venue in Long Island, to an audience packed with tennis-wear-bedecked Hamptonites] Submitted by Mark.

"Looks like the greatest retreat of Goths since the dawn of Renaissance" [As he took the stage from Peter Murphy in 1990 and gazed at the audience] Submitted by Mark.

"Well, we came here in 1984, and then we came back in 1986. Now, it's 1988 and we're here again, and I'll be damned if we're coming back in fucking 1990!" [Yet, there they were in '91 supporting GAF....hee hee] Submitted by John Shuler.

"I'm good...see?" [with a wink, while playing pinball before a "Starfish" gig at The Living Room in Providence, after being asked, "Hi Steve - how are you?" (by moi)] Submitted by John Shuler.

"I worship the primeval lord, Govinda who appears as Visnu with the conch, the lotus, the mace, and the disc. He advents himself with his eternal confidential associates and especially appears to conquer irreleigion and delight his pure devotees." Submitted by Me

"P.S. Loved the Anti-Steve" Submitted by Me

"You're welcome." [After my wife and I said thank you for a great show.] Submitted by Jack

"You go to see fucking Judas Priest you get what you deserve." [commenting on my friend Chris bringing earplugs to the show due to a bad experience at a Judas Priest show when he was 16 (he's now 31)] Submitted by Eric.

"Y'know, we do kind of different versions of the same  ...mistake." [on performing night after night.] Submitted by Chrispy.

". . . Chrispy? That's a fucking silly name." Submitted by Chrispy.

I encourage youto submit your own SK quotes


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